Hello. Yea I'm
art. I am X years old and bumming around.. This is my blog so I can say anything I want to say here and I deserve respect so if you don't give a damn you are very much welcome to leave. Cheers for me.
So, you somehow got in here. Well if you had'nt realise it yet, this is actually my blog.
Yea well, go on and read. I guess.
If you like it, comment on it.
If you don't like it, do comment on it as well.
=D
By the way, just in case u end up looking at my archives, and you somehow click on it, it will bring you back to this page right here.
But fret not!
you just have to click on the entries page once again to view the archives.
Troublesome, I know.
Anyway,
Cheers for me.
Again.
last letter
written at Tuesday, February 19, 2008
mood- depressedmusic- nonerhea, ull prollly dismiss this letter riteawae, but i hopeu dunt. for this is wad im thinkin, and this is all i have left.
im sorry tat u mistook it the wrong way. and im sorry i mistook wad u were trying to say.how shd i know. u were saying things liek neither am i a fan of someone who restricts me and im not stupid. u were til u was like tat.. how am i supposed not to think tat u werent talking along these lines when u were saying like tat. u prolly wont even look at me from now on. u prolly wont think abt me either. maybe for u its normal. for me u were everythinig. u took my heart awae on that first day. and now im left wit hnothing. memories la. im moving on. I am. it may not matter to u anymore. but it matters to a whole lot. y wld i tell ppl i had a a gf? coz im damn proud of it. coz im excited of the prospects. coz i tot finally theres light inside the tunnel. coz i tot my bad luck finally ends. i know first hand wad kind of person u are. for all the times u say i was stupid, i was stupid enuf to fall for u on tat very first day. BUT! i love every single moment of it. maybe things wld be different had we got tghr in july. coz by then id be schoolin and we wunt be seeing each other much and so teh chances of me cling clingy are slim. buts tats just wishful thinkin for we are going nowhr now. IM SCREAMING AT MYSLEF RITE NOW, ITS OVER GET ON WITH IT!!!! if its tat simple, den all my problems wld go awae everytime i do tat. but does it?!!!! i may behave immature, but i do have an adults thinkin no matetr wad u may think. so stop saying it dosent matetr it dosent matter! it matters to me coz u mean that much. i dunno when and how these things started, 080108 till prolly 080208. we may broke up on teh 14th la. but i know we werent already talking on teh 08. liek just now even though u see me not a hi, but just a quick walkawae with val and completely iognore me.. how am i suposed not to think tat u were disgusted with me. WAD DID I DO?!!
I didnt think of ur situation liek on the phone and stuff. wad does tat mean???????? eveytime u talk to me i listen to u pertinently. i listen. ok i listen!!!! wad do u mean i dunt do anything. i tell u some of the solutions i had in mind. liek telling off ur superior coz shes not doing rite! but u alwaes go on saying tat no my solutions is way off. not gd! im trying to help. but got brushed aside. and now u say tat i dont think of ur situation like on the phone. i cried ok everytime i cant help u. im helpless coz theres a boundary between ur work place and me. wad u wan tme to tell ur sup tat shes doing smt wrong?! if i do tat wad position wld u be in. y teh hell wld i travel so far just o cheer u up. wasit bcoz ur my gf? its coz i care abt everything!!! again! i took ppl for granted. i beleive wad u said. i belive tat wed be together. but shit happens. life throws u a curveball esp when u least expects it. and i damn hate that curveball coz i can never anticipate it. u wunt give a care abt this letter here. its all over. i know. but wheres teh communication in the first place??? theres damn lotsa flaws in the relationship la. but im not one to complain. coz i follow my heart and not my head and this is how i ended up. id give my gf complete freedom. tell me, kick me in teh face taht ull break up if we see each other, tell me seriously. everytime i talk with u, its alwaes been laughing. the lines between seriousness and jokes gets blurred. Still tell me. dunt go telling ur bf tat you guys are special when really u tink its just normal. guys do have feelings too. i have feelings too. how shd i knwo tat ur feelings dosent fade. wad u say then and what u say now, are completely not in sync at all.its way off. i love u guys. i loved u. with all my heart, i did. but. i tink now i can really let go. im feeling tat prolly tis just a puppy crush for u. im not rying to save this rsn. this rsn is over. prolly maybe i was hoping for achance, a miracle. because tehy say, if u love someone, set them free, and if tehy came back to u, its meant to be. u know i actually tot of wanting to pierce my tounge tghr wit u. tot id leave it a secret or smt. but in the end didnt get a chance to tell u. dont go saying things like if u can move on, den u shd. u shd knwo better. its not tat easy to let go of someone u dearly love. tat soemone ud pour everything to.
girls are troublesome u said? cmon la. life is troubleosme rite in teh beginning. what do u knw anywae. wad do u knw wat ive been thru anywae. prolly will say, dunno dun care, ya? did u know im useless in my family? in my mums eyes? in my fathers presense? did u know tat? even though i werked so hard to get into express stream they still called me stupid? dunno dun care ya? i know frst hand wad troublesome means so stop sprouting nonsense when u dunno anything yet.
well whatever. liek u said. its over. get a grip art. get a grip.
sigh watever. for everything i did i did it for u. without any regrets or watsoever. and i stand my ground.
if u got smt to say, do reply. sigh.
yours,
art
artzero |
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xx YEARS OLD WRITER, FROM SINGAPURA
JUST SOME IDIOT SEEING THE WORLD ANEW. WITH DOORS AJAR, PEEKED THRU THE FUTURE OF WHAT MAY BE. OPTIMISTIC THRUOUT. LAUGHTER IS INDEED THE BEST MEDCINE.
QUIET BUT ECCENTRIC.
KIND YET CRUEL.
SENSIBLE AND EMOTIONAL AT THE SAME TIME.
NONCHALANT AND IGNORANT.
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I AM WHAT I AM.
IM YOUR COOLEST MOTHAFUCKIN' BASTARD AROUND, AND YOU
CAN DO NO SHIT ABOUT IT.
PEACE!!
